Why Thanksgiving is Pointless

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Most of us have our favorite holiday. Or we have the one that our family does “bigger” than the rest. People get together and show each other more love on these favorite holidays. Food is always the showstopper and family conversations fill up every room.

I like all holidays. From Easter to the 4th of July, I love dressing up and having any reason to celebrate. Not everyone can relate, but I have had a good time celebrating life every chance that I get.

Thanksgiving is different. There are no bunnies or Santa Clauses representing the day. With the exception of pilgrims and Indians, there really are no mascots. There are pumpkins involved as if Halloween was never forgotten. It’s all pretty confusing. It’s even gotten to the point where some people don’t even know the history behind it.

Thanksgiving is pretty pointless if you ask me. Who even likes pumpkin pie and turkey with mashed potatoes?  Why give thanks when life is so hard? Why surround yourself with people who just happen to share DNA with you? Why surround yourself with people who you have learned to call family?  Why celebrate a day whose message has gotten lost throughout the years?

I don’t know, but I sure love pumpkin pie, mashed potatoes, and turkey. Above all, I love all my blood relatives and the many people who I’ve decided to call family throughout the years.

I can honestly say Thanksgiving is pointless because of the fact that I give thanks for all I have every single day. But I sure love having an excuse to come together to stuff our faces and talk about all that matters to us.

My family does Thanksgiving in a big way. It is probably the biggest holiday for us. We all get together and bring too much food so we can all go home with five extra plates in our hands. My cousins and I have always had fun sitting at the “kid” table while the adults talk about their own nonsense at the “adult” table.

This year I am thankful for more than ever. My mother is healthy after a difficult year. My sister made it to 21, and my Dad is loving the retired life. I have finally found my dream job, own a beautiful house and car, and recently got a baby Bengal kitten with my love. Not only that but the first book I helped write got published and printed this week!

I didn’t get here without being thankful for my blessings each day. Today is pointless but meaningful. It marks a great moment in time for me and my family. I am still growing up and am so thankful that my support system is alive and well. I have so much love in my life and heart that it hurts and things cannot get any better than this.

We must be thankful each day. We must regularly call our loved ones to just say, “I love you.” We must not judge those people or things that we do not understand. We must understand that with gratitude comes greatness. Life without gratitude can really be underwhelming. I choose to live a life full of meaning, gratitude, and love.

What do you choose to live by?

 

Love Deeply and Forever,

Karen

 

Why You Don’t Have To Like Me

like, me, why, mean, nice, respect, heart, humanity, demand, love, accept, journey, advice, life, success, relationships, grow, growth, 20s, 30s, learn, change,When I was younger, I always wanted to fit in. Like most other kids, I wanted to be accepted and liked. I wanted to have cool friends that I could always hang out with.

I never really fit in anywhere. My culturally diverse background left me neither here nor there. I was never white enough or Mexican enough. I still tried to fit in, though.

When I got to high school, I said F*** it. I am who I am, if people don’t like it then that’s too bad. So I became a mean girl. Why?  Well, because I just could.

I had awesome friends but I was never too awesome myself. I didn’t care about anything or anyone. I was bitter and angry at the world and my only friend was oftentimes music. Lyrics got me. Lyrics accepted me.

I learned to find the balance between being too nice and being too mean somewhere in my 20s. I am who I am. I am sarcastic but have learned to be sweeter. I am rude but have learned to be well-mannered, well, most of the time anyway.

Now that I am closer to 30 than I am to 20 I realize no one has to like me. Those that matter are simply three people, mom, dad and my sister. They’ll forever love me unconditionally. I can count my friends on one hand and life is awesome this way.

If you don’t know me yet, you don’t have to like me. I am very opinionated so I would honestly be surprised if you did learn to like me. I have a pure heart but it’s often very guarded. And with good reason. Like many people, I have been broken and I have put myself back together.

I don’t demand you like me but I do demand respect. I respect all people who have love in their hearts. Even if it is hidden, I respect you. I respect all people who have talent and who have a set of strong values like integrity. I even respect people who don’t know any better because they might be a product of circumstance.

If you and you hate my guts, that’s fine. Just show me respect to my face. Maybe you don’t like what I say or how I do, but what better reason to respect others than for their differences.

I have had many situations where I judge books by their covers. I mean, haven’t we all? I then find the humanity within their hearts and forget all ill-conceived notions.

I believe in mutual respect among all mankind. We are on a certain journey together and most of us are simply trying to make the best out of this fleeting moment we call life.

We don’t have to agree or understand those around us but I do think it is necessary to respect. Respect beliefs, respect views, respect space, respect possessions, respect journeys, respect cultures, respect differences. We don’t have to be best friends with our neighbors but mutual respect goes a very long way.

Choose love. Choose acceptance. Choose respect.

Love Deeply and Forever,

Karen

The One Thing You Can Never Get Back Once It’s Gone

look, looking, lost, lose, get, back, one, thing, can't, once, gone, reputation, credibility, trust, circle, communication, people, style, lie, lies, liar, you, believe, I am at that point in my life where I have learned a lot about people and how to communicate with them. It is important to have the right tone with the right people and always adjust your style depending on the situation and audience.

It’s always fun to meet new people and learn how they work. Some people respond better to humor, while others prefer a more direct form of communication. I have even met some people who prefer to talk about everything in the context of dating.

Communication and credibility are key when establishing new relationships and nurturing old ones. Credibility can be established through means of positive and effective communication.

Credibility is very important in life and losing credibility can be life altering.  Once people cannot trust you, it’s over. It can forever damage your reputation. And once that is damaged, good luck ever really repairing it.

Once your coined a liar, you can’t apologize and say you have changed and expect the world to trust you again. I mean, you can, but that doesn’t mean they necessarily will. People will always have that doubt that you are not being truthful.

I have encountered many people who just like to lie. Whether it’s about a past experience that didn’t happen or a movie they never watched, they lie through their teeth at all costs.

I am not sure if it is a defense mechanism they acquired while growing up, or something else, but these people are to never be trusted.

I even worked very close with someone who turned out to be the liar of all liars. They lied about everything just to get a reaction out of me. They lent advice that was only to sabotage me, and it wasn’t until I verified one of their white lies that I realized this person never speaks their truth. It was unfortunate but true.

The moment I realized this person was King Liar, was the moment I stopped sharing anything worth sharing with them. I no longer confided in them and I found myself constantly looking over my shoulder in their presence.

It affected me. I must admit this. Did I let it affect me more than a day? No. I began to find it comical and made sure to never share anything of depth with that lying person again.

So, what’s the point of my long rant? A good reputation is the one thing you can never get back. Once it is gone, it is gone.

Consistency is key in all that you do and consistently lying will only get people to consistently not trust you. If they cannot trust you, you lose all credibility and people will refuse to be around you or have you be a part of any their circles.

Be careful with what you say, don’t say, and wish you could say. Sometimes less is more. Lies can break you, your reputation, and those who once believed in you.  And once you break something or someone, it can’t easily be put back together. Take care of what you have. Take care of you. Take care of your reputation.

Love Deeply and Forever,

Karen