I’ve watched every Lifetime movie you can possibly watch about cheaters. The cheating spouse, the cheating girlfriend, the cheating teacher and even the cheating housekeeper. I equally hate them all. Every movie makes my stomach sink as I instantly feel nausea come over me.
I understand even cheaters are human. I understand mistakes happen. I understand no one is perfect and decisions do not define us. Personally, I have been in both kinds of relationships. I have been in one I constantly thought about cheating in. And those I never considered it a possibility in.
I used to wonder if we could blame biology for cheating thoughts but now I see it is all within the individual. In my case, the relationship was obviously weak and being unfaithful would not have been natural, or anyone else’s fault, but mine.
Impulses are natural, while acting on these impulses is not. To consider someone attractive is natural. To go out with someone and seek out an affair has nothing to do with nature.
To say infidelity is natural is like saying lying is natural. The urge to cheat may be natural not the act of cheating itself. People use scientific studies as an excuse for cheating.
Although experts have done studies that prove true monogamy is rare among humans, that does not make infidelity natural or justify it by any means.
While some animals practice polygamy, that doesn’t mean humans are meant to practice infidelity. We are conscious of our actions and mentally more advanced than mammals.
Just because the impulse to cheat is natural and proven by biology, does not mean the act of infidelity is natural or should be used as any sort of excuse for cheating.
Truth is, many people feel the need to have a scientific reason for everything in order to feel in control of everything. So if you are cheating on your spouse and justify it with biology, then you feel you have no one to blame but nature. If you are an alcoholic, blame it solely on your genes because grandpa was a drunk.
Humans can help doing what comes naturally. We are conscious of our actions and the consequences that follow. This is what sets us apart from simple and even more complex minded animals. We are humans, and although some of us would like to blame nature for our poor mistakes, we can only blame our own poor judgement.
It is a matter of taking responsibility for your actions and some people have a big problem with this. Being unfaithful is just easier than being faithful.
The urge to cheat can be natural but you have to think about it before actually acting on it. It is not like nature just calls for you to cheat. Nature might try to sway you, but your heart and soul are your true guides. Listen to both before you go breaking someone else’s heart.