The Reason You Will Never Have Your Shit Together

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The other day I was called old. Yes, this 20-something was called old and next in line to be “married.”

I thought it was 2017 and things were more progressive than ever. I guess I was wrong.

My parents’ generation is a bit old school and sometimes I like it. During this situation, I obviously didn’t. I said, “Who are YOU calling old!?” Obviously I’m 20-something, since I am still a little brat.

In that moment, I realized it can only go downhill from here. I have decided to not tell anyone my age on my birthday anymore. I never thought I would become that girl… However, I will never own up to the title “old.”

So, why does this word “old” bother me so much? Well, maybe because when I was younger, I believed “old” meant you would have your shit together. I thought by late 20s, all the “shit” would be all figured out. I would be in my happily ever after house cooking for my tiny little happily ever after humans.

I read an article last night about a 32-year-old who still doesn’t have their shit together. Below the article, a 40-something year old said they didn’t either. Then it dawned on me, no one will ever have their shit “together.”

I sometimes feel like we are all just tiny little babies running around in grownup cars and clothes. The truth is, we might never have our shit together.

We can become successful, but if you have any ambition, you will always be hungry for more. It will possibly never be enough or we might feel like we are not ever doing enough. For loved ones, for friends, or for the world as a whole.

So, is there really anything wrong with always striving for more? With never feeling like you have done enough? With feeling you are a scattered mess in your head? With worrying about or planning for a future that might never come?


There is nothing wrong with never having your shit together. In actuality, you might have settled if you feel you have every single part of your life all figured out. There is always going to be more to learn, do, see, and strive for.

Even if you are Elon Musk, your shit might still not be “together.” The poor guy had to get a divorce because he was simply not present enough in his marriage. Well, excccuuuse me, Mr. SpaceX, you don’t have your shit totally together either.

I’ll admit, the little version of me thought having your shit together was the endgame. I thought all the mysteries in the world would be solved. I thought good would always defeat evil. I thought I would not have a worry in the world by a certain age or after certain life events. But I promise you, the person who appears to have their shit totally together most possibly is falling apart at the seams.

It’s okay to never have your shit together.

It’s okay to always want more.

It’s okay to live your life at your own pace and in your own way.

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Author: Karen Dominique

I am a writer of sorts. It is my passion above all else. If you need any coaching or ghost writing services please feel free contact me.