Why I Don’t Care That I Crashed My Car

car, crash, alive, blessings, blessed, gratitude, safe, thankful, present, life, wake up, brain, off, on, work, new, transition, drive, scary, why, I, don't, careI started a new job recently and am over the moon about it. It is exactly what I wanted to do and my heart is filled with endless gratitude. With this new gig comes a new way of life. I have adjusted to waking up earlier than ever and not having the option of escaping an office at any sign of stress.

The transition has been much smoother than I thought it would be but having a desk job is definitely not my familiar. Driving used to be the norm for me. I was always filled with adrenaline while fighting traffic. Those days are over, and for that, I am grateful.

I only drive about 30 minutes a day now which is pretty awesome. But my desk job takes so much of my brain power, that by the time work is over my brain just doesn’t want to think anymore. It shuts off immediately. It’s kind of strange and scary.

I headed home the other day after a long day at work. I went to wash and detail my car and got into a car crash as I exited the car wash. I followed the person while shaking in my boots. I just kept hoping everyone in the other car was okay.

The other driver finally pulled over, after what felt like 10 minutes of following them. They were calmer than I was. I honestly didn’t care what the physical damage was. I just wanted to make sure everyone was safe and sound.

I’ve crashed before, but never into a person in a moving vehicle. In the past, I would have been hysterically crying about the damage to my car. I would not have cared about anything but the money it would cost to fix my car.

This time everything felt different. I didn’t care about petty personal property, I simply cared about all the humans involved. The dent in my car was meaningless. My car is new, but who really cares? All parties were safe and that is a miracle alone.

The movie “Crash” immediately came to mind after this incident. Was I so mentally tired after such a long day that I became numb before colliding with another driver? Was I involved in a crash so I could be reminded to wake up and simply feel something? 

Who knows.

What I do know is that I definitely woke up in that moment. I looked around and counted each of my blessings. The point is to count all of your blessings in this way on a daily basis, not simply after a horrific incident.

Staring death in the eye shouldn’t be the catalyst, you should be the catalyst. Be that person who wakes up and never forgets what they are grateful for. I admit I have to work on this throughout the day and during mundane tasks like driving home.

I don’t think I was present enough in that telling moment. I was mechanically driving, but my mind was in “off” mode. Let’s never be “off.” Life is too beautiful to forget to be present. Yes, it is easy to let our minds wander, but let’s make it a point to limit this.

Had my physical life ended in that moment, I would have nothing to show for it but a blank mind eager to enjoy a mindless evening.

My life is in transition and it more important than ever to stay present, in my life, my career, and all of my heartfelt relationships. Changes are never easy and this crash proves that. Just when I thought all the threat and danger of driving was gone, it came back to slap me in the face.

I must always remember that I am alive, I am powerful, I am loveable, I am valuable, and I must stay forever present.

Don’t fall asleep in your waking life, that is what dreaming is for.

Stay alive. Stay present. Stay thankful.

Love Deeply and Forever,

Karen

How Your Attitude Can Change People Around You

attitude, people, strangers, work, job, thank you, connect, energy, journey, story, happy, smile, integrity, impact, goodbye, leave, change, see, heard, appreciate,As I previously mentioned, I am currently in the process of leaving a job of over 5 years. I am visiting all current and past clients and saying my respects. It almost feels as if I am dying in a weird way. I say this because of every person’s reaction to my news.

I can’t say I have ever felt as appreciated as I do today.

In real life, grown-up life, the life that happens after you are all done with your schooling, there are no report cards. There are rarely even any pats on the back. People expect you to do your job, do it right and never falter. The only time people usually take notice is if you fail them in some way.

I have worked really hard to establish lasting relationships at my job. I did this by always trying to stay positive. I have always smiled at everyone I encounter even when my day is not going my way.

I have always taken the time to say thank you and ask people what it is that they are going through. I first did this to pass the time, but I quickly realized other people’s journeys are always interesting to listen to. They put my own into perspective and help me get to know their hearts.

As I am saying my goodbyes, I can’t help but realize how much I have been loved throughout my 5 years at this company. I have had a lot of teary eyes and amazing heartfelt hugs surround me these past two weeks.

I have had people said some of the most beautiful words like, “You are the only person who comes in here and says nice things to us,” to “You are beautiful, brilliant and will do great wherever you go in life,” to “Over the last 5 years I have only seen you down once!”

My favorite was, “It’s like you’re going on an amazing vacation and not taking any of us with you!”

It feels like people are writing in my yearbook. It feels amazing to know I have made an impact in so many lives. People have told me my energy is contagious and that my smile is what they will miss most. It was hard to see such words coming as I worked so hard over the years for no other reason than that of excelling at my job for my own satisfaction.

I did everything with integrity so that when this moment came, people could look at me and not complain. It is humbling to not only have no complaints, but to have so many beautiful words directed at my heart.

I have seen people slam the doors behind them, and that is all great and dandy. To each their own, as they say. But I really have to let the world know that I am feeling as I say goodbye to my company of so many years. It is something I have never felt before. It is something I hope everyone can experience at some point in their life.

I feel valued, appreciated, loved, noticed, but most importantly, I feel like I am part of the fabric that weaves their individual stories.

I feel more than blessed, I feel honored. Thank you to all of those people who have expressed their feelings to me. I feel seen, heard and forever remembered.

Love Deeply and Forever,

Karen