Why You Don’t Have To Like Me

like, me, why, mean, nice, respect, heart, humanity, demand, love, accept, journey, advice, life, success, relationships, grow, growth, 20s, 30s, learn, change,When I was younger, I always wanted to fit in. Like most other kids, I wanted to be accepted and liked. I wanted to have cool friends that I could always hang out with.

I never really fit in anywhere. My culturally diverse background left me neither here nor there. I was never white enough or Mexican enough. I still tried to fit in, though.

When I got to high school, I said F*** it. I am who I am, if people don’t like it then that’s too bad. So I became a mean girl. Why?  Well, because I just could.

I had awesome friends but I was never too awesome myself. I didn’t care about anything or anyone. I was bitter and angry at the world and my only friend was oftentimes music. Lyrics got me. Lyrics accepted me.

I learned to find the balance between being too nice and being too mean somewhere in my 20s. I am who I am. I am sarcastic but have learned to be sweeter. I am rude but have learned to be well-mannered, well, most of the time anyway.

Now that I am closer to 30 than I am to 20 I realize no one has to like me. Those that matter are simply three people, mom, dad and my sister. They’ll forever love me unconditionally. I can count my friends on one hand and life is awesome this way.

If you don’t know me yet, you don’t have to like me. I am very opinionated so I would honestly be surprised if you did learn to like me. I have a pure heart but it’s often very guarded. And with good reason. Like many people, I have been broken and I have put myself back together.

I don’t demand you like me but I do demand respect. I respect all people who have love in their hearts. Even if it is hidden, I respect you. I respect all people who have talent and who have a set of strong values like integrity. I even respect people who don’t know any better because they might be a product of circumstance.

If you and you hate my guts, that’s fine. Just show me respect to my face. Maybe you don’t like what I say or how I do, but what better reason to respect others than for their differences.

I have had many situations where I judge books by their covers. I mean, haven’t we all? I then find the humanity within their hearts and forget all ill-conceived notions.

I believe in mutual respect among all mankind. We are on a certain journey together and most of us are simply trying to make the best out of this fleeting moment we call life.

We don’t have to agree or understand those around us but I do think it is necessary to respect. Respect beliefs, respect views, respect space, respect possessions, respect journeys, respect cultures, respect differences. We don’t have to be best friends with our neighbors but mutual respect goes a very long way.

Choose love. Choose acceptance. Choose respect.

Love Deeply and Forever,

Karen

Is There Ever A Reason For a Mass Shooting?

las vegas, massacre, death, kill, shoot, shooter, mass shotting, mandalay bay, country, music, concert, rifle, crazy, insance, pyschopath, mental, ill, sick, angry, upset, hate, love, together, story, why, matter, reason, motive, matter, death, casualties, survive, involved, help, donate, gofundme, heart, give,I know this topic is trending. I know many political issues will come to the fore again. I dislike writing about what everyone else is but my heart aches, so I will go with what my heart wants to write about.

I go to Las Vegas very often. I also regularly attend shows and concerts there. Last time I went to Vegas I had the lingering thought that something terrible could happen while there. And while these thoughts do not serve me, they do plague many minds.

How could they not? With so many recent violent acts, it is hard not to be afraid.

I heard a witness say this morning that he really doesn’t care “why” this person did this. I must agree with him.

I don’t care what you are going through, who you are angry with, who did you wrong, why you are dissatisfied with your life or the reasons you jotted down on paper or in your mind, there is no real “motive” or “reason” for killing innocent people.

I know we are obsessed with finding reasons for all tragedies. I know it is difficult not to put issues, incidents, and things into certain categories to better understand them.

I do much the same, I often want to know more about the “killer” or the person we have to blame for so much pain during such instances. I watch a lot of real crime and forensic shows so I often want to play detective myself.

I don’t want to do that today. I don’t care who this guy was. We have already made so many killers famous through means of their channeled hate. I choose love and I choose to help those affected in any way possible.

I don’t usually donate money to anything, mostly because I don’t have much to give, but that all changed today. I don’t have much to give, but I will give what I can with all of my heart… I donated to the Las Vegas Victims’ Fund GoFundMe page this morning. I didn’t do it for myself, I did it for all of the families affected by this tragedy. I really didn’t have a choice.

This tragedy hits extremely close to home for me. Las Vegas really does feel like a second home for me, it’s definitely my safe haven. I go there to escape the routine and just have a good time (as do most people).

To The Killer: You are a coward. I don’t care why you did this, but I do care that you have instilled fear and pain among humanity in general. I will do what I can to help those that survived and the families of all those involved. I want to know about the people affected, I want to know their stories, I want to know no more about you.

You will only bring us closer together.

I have a friend who I lost to suicide. And while I wish I knew the reason “why”, it really doesn’t even matter anymore. He is gone and nothing will bring him back. The same goes for all those lost and wounded during this massacre. The “why” someone decided to this is inconsequential, in the end, it really doesn’t matter.

What does matter is what we do as a society after such an incident.

I do often wonder if my friend was always mentally ill or if it was a sheer moment of panic that took him over. The same goes for this horrible gunman, I wonder if you were always sick or if you went through a sick moment. But then I think, if I do find this out, will it finally put my heart and mind at ease?

Probably not.

Is there ever a motive or reason for a mass shooting? No. We all have free will and unfortunately some choose to provoke pain upon others and/or themselves.

Love Deeply and Forever,

Karen