Why You Don’t Have To Like Me

like, me, why, mean, nice, respect, heart, humanity, demand, love, accept, journey, advice, life, success, relationships, grow, growth, 20s, 30s, learn, change,When I was younger, I always wanted to fit in. Like most other kids, I wanted to be accepted and liked. I wanted to have cool friends that I could always hang out with.

I never really fit in anywhere. My culturally diverse background left me neither here nor there. I was never white enough or Mexican enough. I still tried to fit in, though.

When I got to high school, I said F*** it. I am who I am, if people don’t like it then that’s too bad. So I became a mean girl. Why?  Well, because I just could.

I had awesome friends but I was never too awesome myself. I didn’t care about anything or anyone. I was bitter and angry at the world and my only friend was oftentimes music. Lyrics got me. Lyrics accepted me.

I learned to find the balance between being too nice and being too mean somewhere in my 20s. I am who I am. I am sarcastic but have learned to be sweeter. I am rude but have learned to be well-mannered, well, most of the time anyway.

Now that I am closer to 30 than I am to 20 I realize no one has to like me. Those that matter are simply three people, mom, dad and my sister. They’ll forever love me unconditionally. I can count my friends on one hand and life is awesome this way.

If you don’t know me yet, you don’t have to like me. I am very opinionated so I would honestly be surprised if you did learn to like me. I have a pure heart but it’s often very guarded. And with good reason. Like many people, I have been broken and I have put myself back together.

I don’t demand you like me but I do demand respect. I respect all people who have love in their hearts. Even if it is hidden, I respect you. I respect all people who have talent and who have a set of strong values like integrity. I even respect people who don’t know any better because they might be a product of circumstance.

If you and you hate my guts, that’s fine. Just show me respect to my face. Maybe you don’t like what I say or how I do, but what better reason to respect others than for their differences.

I have had many situations where I judge books by their covers. I mean, haven’t we all? I then find the humanity within their hearts and forget all ill-conceived notions.

I believe in mutual respect among all mankind. We are on a certain journey together and most of us are simply trying to make the best out of this fleeting moment we call life.

We don’t have to agree or understand those around us but I do think it is necessary to respect. Respect beliefs, respect views, respect space, respect possessions, respect journeys, respect cultures, respect differences. We don’t have to be best friends with our neighbors but mutual respect goes a very long way.

Choose love. Choose acceptance. Choose respect.

Love Deeply and Forever,

Karen

Why My 20s Are The Best And Worst Years Of My Life

best, fast, brain, 25, time, irony, naive,worst, 20, 30, 20s, 30s, life, grow, learn, limits, death, rock, bottom, test, age, time, lessons, know, knew, human, love, integrity, wrong, young, heart, I remember being 16. I remember being 11. Anything before that is a complete blur. And after 16, I just remember turning 20. At 20, I knew it all. I was invincible. I was all that and so much more. If someone called, I never answered. If someone wanted to tell me otherwise, I never listened.

21 was always near death. I was testing every and any limit. How much alcohol could my body take? How fast could my car go? How much abuse could my heart handle?

Thinking back, my early 20s were pretty horrific. If pain is glory, then my early 20s were pretty glorious. I didn’t know who I was or who I wanted to be. I had a plan I thought would one day magically come together but I was doing everything to keep that from happening. Ironic, huh?

My early 20s were full of irony. I was full of naivety.

At 21, I hit my rock bottom. By 22, I was trying to piece my life back together. I was more lost than I had ever been before. I wanted to meet rejects like me so I did. I hung out with them night and day and thought I was just like them. I was living a double-life as if I had learned absolutely nothing from my troubled past.

By 23, I was still stumbling. I kept falling like baby Bambi.

They say by 25 your brain stops developing and your values become set in stone. It’s true, by 25, I wanted life to hurry the f up. I was tired of making mistakes and decided it was time to settle down. My mind and body felt older than they ever had before. By this point, I knew who I was. I had become a person filled with love, happiness, and integrity.

How did that happen? From 23 to 25 I had grown up. I was still working at my kid job, but there I was, putting in my time and dedication. I learned that inconsistency was a thing of my past and that if you ever want to be respected you must be consistent in everything that you do.

One thing is for sure, I have never loved myself as much as I do today. I am now officially in my late 20s and so proud of my journey. I am proud of every one of my scars. I am proud of all the things I didn’t know that I eventually learned. I am looking forward to learning so much more, about not only myself but humanity in general.

My 20s have been turbulent, to say the least. They have been more beautiful than I ever thought they could be. They have taught me who I am and who I never want to be. They have shown me I am valuable, special and loved.

Above all, they have proved to me that I still have so much more to learn. And so much more to see, feel and listen to. And while I might think I have it all figured out now, I am sure my 30s will prove me to be extremely wrong.

Love Deeply and Forever,

Karen

How To Get Your Dream Job

dream, job, work, dedication, kind, hard, how, to, give up, stuck, timing, hope, believe, how to, degree, school, learn, life, purpose, enough, thankful, best, hard, dream, life, fake, itI have been writing my entire life and always hoped it would be something I could do for my entire life. I have gone to school and gotten all the degrees I needed to get to make this my career.

My parents always told me that the degree was the key to my success. My professors always told me I had a gift. I have tried to share this gift with the world only to have doors slammed in my face.

Recruiters have said they are looking for someone with 10 plus years experience. They have also described they want someone who has a proven “track record,” of their persuasive writing skills.

I have always been perplexed. What do you mean? My A+ papers in college don’t count? All of my teachers’ words of encouragement are not enough to prove I am skilled at my craft?

Absolutely not.

This all became loud and clear to me throughout the years. I felt like a failure for a long time. I felt stuck.

I have never been a person who is okay with settling. I have always loved challenges to my intelligence and believed my dream job would offer this for the rest of my life.

I even got to the point where I realized the only way I could share my gift with the world was to give it away for free. So, I did just that. I helped everyone pro bono with no desire to be compensated in any way.

I think that’s when everything changed. I started doing what I loved for fun. I never gave up. I started writing every day. I started acting like I already had my dream job. I thought, “I know I can fake it ’till I make it.”

The most important part of my journey is the fact that I gave my all at my current job no matter what.

Even if it wasn’t my “dream job” it was my job for today and I was thankful for that. I was thankful for living a comfortable life filled with delicious food and amazing relationships. I was thankful for feeling a sense of continuity and stability for so many years.

I even bought a house and a car. I started filling up my life will all the things that aligned with my dream job. I figured the job would come if I just made room for it. I told myself I was worthy of a fulfilling career. I did this all while never holding back at my current job.

I tried to be the best at what I did because that was what I was taught to do. I have the mentality of: If I am going to clean bathrooms, I will be the best bathroom cleaner you have ever seen. And guess what? This type of hard work never goes unnoticed. I even had clients nickname me, “Cinderell-y.”

Timing is everything. No matter what anyone ever tells you, you need to know that timing is always on your side. If you ever feel like giving up, remember everything happens exactly when it is supposed to.

And while we oftentimes fall into funks where we think we haven’t accomplished enough or achieved our sole life purpose, remember that every day you can make a difference. You can do this through acts of kindness, hard work and sincere dedication in all that you do.

If you want the dream job, be sure to first create your dream life.