Why I Don’t Care That I Crashed My Car

car, crash, alive, blessings, blessed, gratitude, safe, thankful, present, life, wake up, brain, off, on, work, new, transition, drive, scary, why, I, don't, careI started a new job recently and am over the moon about it. It is exactly what I wanted to do and my heart is filled with endless gratitude. With this new gig comes a new way of life. I have adjusted to waking up earlier than ever and not having the option of escaping an office at any sign of stress.

The transition has been much smoother than I thought it would be but having a desk job is definitely not my familiar. Driving used to be the norm for me. I was always filled with adrenaline while fighting traffic. Those days are over, and for that, I am grateful.

I only drive about 30 minutes a day now which is pretty awesome. But my desk job takes so much of my brain power, that by the time work is over my brain just doesn’t want to think anymore. It shuts off immediately. It’s kind of strange and scary.

I headed home the other day after a long day at work. I went to wash and detail my car and got into a car crash as I exited the car wash. I followed the person while shaking in my boots. I just kept hoping everyone in the other car was okay.

The other driver finally pulled over, after what felt like 10 minutes of following them. They were calmer than I was. I honestly didn’t care what the physical damage was. I just wanted to make sure everyone was safe and sound.

I’ve crashed before, but never into a person in a moving vehicle. In the past, I would have been hysterically crying about the damage to my car. I would not have cared about anything but the money it would cost to fix my car.

This time everything felt different. I didn’t care about petty personal property, I simply cared about all the humans involved. The dent in my car was meaningless. My car is new, but who really cares? All parties were safe and that is a miracle alone.

The movie “Crash” immediately came to mind after this incident. Was I so mentally tired after such a long day that I became numb before colliding with another driver? Was I involved in a crash so I could be reminded to wake up and simply feel something? 

Who knows.

What I do know is that I definitely woke up in that moment. I looked around and counted each of my blessings. The point is to count all of your blessings in this way on a daily basis, not simply after a horrific incident.

Staring death in the eye shouldn’t be the catalyst, you should be the catalyst. Be that person who wakes up and never forgets what they are grateful for. I admit I have to work on this throughout the day and during mundane tasks like driving home.

I don’t think I was present enough in that telling moment. I was mechanically driving, but my mind was in “off” mode. Let’s never be “off.” Life is too beautiful to forget to be present. Yes, it is easy to let our minds wander, but let’s make it a point to limit this.

Had my physical life ended in that moment, I would have nothing to show for it but a blank mind eager to enjoy a mindless evening.

My life is in transition and it more important than ever to stay present, in my life, my career, and all of my heartfelt relationships. Changes are never easy and this crash proves that. Just when I thought all the threat and danger of driving was gone, it came back to slap me in the face.

I must always remember that I am alive, I am powerful, I am loveable, I am valuable, and I must stay forever present.

Don’t fall asleep in your waking life, that is what dreaming is for.

Stay alive. Stay present. Stay thankful.

Love Deeply and Forever,


The Best Skills To Have In Any And Every Career

Who am I? I ask myself this quite often as I am in the process of marketing myself. I have gone through a lot of schooling and realized the best life lessons are those never taught to you in school.

So what are the best skills to have in any and every career ever? What skills will forever transfer across our resumes and make us more than just marketable, but likeable and reliable as well?

Adaptability and integrity.

I have always been a creature of structure and routine. I love rules and direct instruction. The truth is, life is not structured in any way. Things will be thrown at us and it is our job to open our minds and hearts to change in order to adapt to every which environment and situation. This will push us to take action instead of living in fear no matter what the circumstance. If we can take sour lemons and make something that resembles lemonade than life will always taste amazing.

The second lesson life has taught me is that having integrity is everything. It is easy to do the right thing when people are watching and praising us but the true test is whether we can do the same when no one is around. It is important do the right thing at all times, not only when it is going to make us look good. If we stay consistent by living a life full of integrity it will be much harder for us to falter even in times of weakness.

It doesn’t matter what field we train in or what dream job we pursue so as long as we stay true to ourselves and the ever-changing world around us. By being adaptable we can take continuous action instead of freezing in place and by having integrity we can maintain a certain level of continuity within our life and our relationships. So, in reality the best skills to have in any and every career are the same as the best skills to have in everyday life.

No, I Am Not Married

I have heard it all. Those that are happily and those that are not. Those that ended up with the person they thought they were marrying and those that did not. The biggest question at 20 something seems to be, “When are you getting married?” or the sweet, “Haven’t you guys been together forever?” No, I am not married. Yes, a lot of my friends are or are in the process of being. I used to take such questions very seriously. I used to think something was completely wrong with me. I thought, maybe I am just not marriage material. Then again, Why do so many people see marriage as the end game? It is the beginning of an entire different chapter and the end of another.

I have heard dating is as good as it gets. Adding a wedding band to the mix will not magically change my partner or myself. Maybe I will just stay ageless and unmarried like Jennifer Aniston. I met with an old friend who completely understood why I am not married…yet. We talked about how social media puts a subconscious pressure on us and how each of our journeys are unique. As a single 20 something I see myself going on social media less and less. I do not dare compare.

Marriage is a socially constructed institution that I am simply not ready for. I am not even ready to live with someone. I live alone. I cook and clean for myself. I am a housewife without the husband or kids and I absolutely love it! I guess you could say I am married to myself and would not have it any other way. At least not yet. No, I am not married. Yes, I am content on my own journey. Yes, I have so much more to figure out about myself and those around me before I bind myself to someone else.